As you can see, I do not like the presentation in three separate lines, I feel the structure should be evident from the poem - which has made me very reluctant to share my flawed attempts - and I prefer to stick to certain traditional forms
But anyway, here goes nothing:
Ancient tree
A pile of timber, or a living monument to eternity?
Above the Rhine
Misty, viny slopes rolling voluptuously; I can almost reach.
Pink sky
Candyfloss floats: it's lighter than the colours of a spring sunrise.
Winter
Duck on a bus-stop: is nature's time-table screwed up too?
However, in trying to apply myself more and more to the art, I've found that I'm much more in my element in a category called senryu: (darkly) humorous poems with the same structure as haiku, but concentrating more on human nature rather than just nature. I don't know if there's a name for :
Journey
Without sunglasses, looking out of train windows is such a headache.
Clippers
Important advice to those with long toenails: don't cut to the quick.
My foot!
There will be a day when plantar fasciitis is eradicated.
Here's a quick diversion into a different structure (5-3-5 instead of 5-7-5):
Gluttony
World hunger must end! Honestly, I didn't eat that much...
And finally one for the internet age. For clarity's sake this one is presented over three lines, internet-speak has rather weak grammar...:
For the win!
WTF?
A/S/L... LMAO!
STFU, K?
1 comments:
wow..i like those a lot..i never got it..and couldn't write a haiku if i had to..but i do know what i like...especially the journey.
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