Today one of my favourite agony uncles, Father Tony, tackles another tricky question on his Bilerico column. (I have always pronounced and still feel the urge to pronounce this as bileRIco instead of bilERico...) I'm posting this here, because it doesn't quite fit as a reply at the original post.
Cecilia asks how to handle a Baptist preacher and her father's siblings on organising her father's funeral. This reminds me somewhat of my grandmother's funeral.
Afterwards, her surviving brothers and sisters wrote an angry letter to the priest for saying a Latin mass instead of using the Dutch, as she had put in writing beforehand.
However, I'm pretty sure her (grand)children didn't care and I'm 100% convinced she wouldn't have. Not only did she adore him, but the man had been in hospital for an operation in between administering her the last rites and the funeral. Unlike the Baptist preacher in question, he knew my grandmother well and despite there being a replacement available - he looked like the lectern was the only thing holding him up - insisted on doing this. So he got the language wrong, who cares?
I've mentioned this before, but my grandmother asked an uncle who held power of attorney to take her mother's gold watch from her home and keep it safe to be given to me after her death. But the aunt everyone feared would object to this never even commented on it.
I'll be turning 36 soon, perhaps I should start putting a few things down in writing (I'll just have a leaf through Singing the Living Tradition and a dozen hymns and readings will come to me...